A girl told me that she once had sex with her phone,
and yes, she did use a condom.
I guess that’s “phone sex” redefined.
Have I ever mentioned how much I hate “lol”?
Back to my point.
For a while,
I was installing applications like mad on my phone,
until I realized, I don’t use most of them.
Now I have begun to explore the applications
that come with my phone, my favorite is the
note taking application.
I often have small bursts of enlightenment,
or inspiration throughout the day.
Wow, I had no idea throughout was one word, cool.
I was reviewing some of the notes that I have made,
some of them I don’t remember writing.
- Why do people say “piping hot”?
That really doesn’t make sense. - I just burped, and it smelled like cardboard,
which is odd as I don’t remember eating any. - Didn’t people used to say “slug bug” and
not “punch dub” when they saw a Volkswagen
and punched you? - That chick on the news has great boobs
I’ve got a lot more, but I type all day and I’m tired.

Apr 20, 2010 @ 20:53:47
hello friend
haven’t heard from you in ages
hope all is well
May 16, 2010 @ 01:27:54
Sorry about that,
I got a little side tracked.
How are you?
May 03, 2010 @ 18:49:40
Leroy, what the hell? You have not blogged in months. This is unacceptable and you should remedy the situation immediately. I demand that you entertain me. Please and stuff.
the word “entertain” just looks weird, doesn’t it?
May 16, 2010 @ 01:26:45
I am a man of the people,
for the people,
by the people,
and with my hand up the people’s,
or at least the female people’s skirt,
I have returned to indulge, and imbibe,
the flavor of said people, for I, vis a vis
the people.
I, Leroy Scandal must give the people,
not what they need,
but what they want,
like sugar to a hyper 2 year old,
I wish to give the people cheap thrills,
immediate gratification,
with no forethought, regard, or concern
for whatever disastrous outcome my soon
follow.
Why you ask?
We will all be taking a nap,
so why would we care?
We can sleep through the hard times,
snooze over troubled waters,
this is the way of the ancients,
those who slept and slept well
four score and seven years ago,
in purple mountain majesties.